The Ninth

[anticirclejerk]

RP HATE MEME

Go nuts. Namedrop, rant, rave, and wank up a storm.

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I am going to delete all the dumb, aspergers worthy discussion threads.

this is not the place for talking about butts and farts and shrimp. take that to your plurk or rpanons.

"No kidding. This breach of privacy can be argued on the fact that the people posting the caps were given permission to be in the private links. So the fault isn't on Anticirclejerk or the ACJ mod, but the component that decided to make the screencap." - Anon

Comments

[hewhoinvites]

I'm sorry that this happened. I can't atone for someone else, but what I can say is that I support the fact that you wish for it to blow over and think that's very mature.

I feel bad that every anon on this community can't do that.

Also, in regards to the 'coward' comments, I can totally respond to this place while I'm at work. No, seriously. I can.

[(Anonymous)]

Would you like a cookie? Congratulations!

I do appreciate that you're sticking up for a friend of yours. I really do. Had it been a friend of mine, then maybe I'd do the same.

At the same time, I can't say I would have done something like this for someone who harassed someone. But maybe that's just me.

Why can't I let go of this personally? Because he's hurt too many of my friends. If it was just me he'd hurt, that would be one thing. But it's not. He's hurt people I really care about, and the worst part is that he hasn't learned.

OP that is too lazy to log in

[(Anonymous)]

Which is why I'll try my hardest to help him learn. I'm willing to go that extra mile or two for my friends.

I don't blame you for your stance in this whole thing either. I can't say I'm a tolerant enough person to be all sunshine and rainbows if someone who I only knew as a 'wanker' hurt friends of mine.

ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

In that case, I really do hope you can help him.

I don't hate Jex, but I hate what he's done to people I care about. Good luck.

[explosivecombat]

Assuming that all of the accounts on here that are commenting logged-in are yours, I'll say that I do respect that you're willing to give people second chances. I also respect that you're willing to stick up for someone with this sort of reputation, although I personally don't agree with doing so, because you stand to gain nothing from this - if nothing else, you risk being labeled a troublemaker right along with Jex should this go badly. Associating with someone like that in the name of second chances and tolerance is, again, not something I necessarily agree with, but I can acknowledge that it's brave of you.

At the same time, I can't say that I agree with several of the statements you're making here. This isn't a matter of him "being an asshole once", this is something that has happened repeatedly, and is continuing to happen. This also isn't a matter of people being closed-minded and refusing to give him a second chance. If someone harassed someone like this in a real-world environment, this wouldn't be tolerated. Jobs have been lost because of things like this. Reputations have been ruined because of things like this. Because this is the internet, people can get away with more, it's true, but that doesn't render the people who aren't willing to tolerate acts like that in the wrong.

Do I think people are behaving badly in these comms? Yes, of course. It's a wank comm, it's essentially designed to cater toward people behaving badly. Do I believe that Jex has hurt everyone doing the wanking? No, of course not, simply because that's the nature of anon; people can claim whatever they wish.

But to insinuate that people should give Jex a second chance after he's hurt them personally isn't acceptable. I'm not going to trot out my life's issues unless asked for specifics, because this isn't the time or place to air those in a bid for sympathy, but I can tell you that I have severe diagnosed PTSD, with very large triggers centered around the things that Jex has done to me. He had no way of knowing that at the time that the initial incidents occurred, so I'm not trying to claim that he's a horrible person for triggering that. He had no way of knowing. However, it would be well within my right to avoid him and not want to give him a second chance at all, in the name of protecting myself psychologically.

In the past, he's done things like ask others for noncon PSLs on the first conversation. Since this was the first time he talked to them - he approached them with this - how was he to know that he wasn't asking a rape victim for this sort of storyline? He's approached people out of nowhere for pregnancy plotlines - how was he supposed to know that he wasn't approaching someone who had just gone through an abortion or the like? It can be claimed that these are unlikely scenarios, and I agree with that much, but it's equally unlikely that he would manage to press almost every single trigger that a given person has that can cause them to go into a PTSD-fueled meltdown, and he managed to do that to me.

I don't know who all of these anons are. I suspect I know some, but certainly not all, so I can't speak for their actions or reasons for doing as they are. But that likewise applies to you - given how seriously, heinously inappropriate Jex's actions are, you don't know how many of these people are well within their rights to not want to give him a second chance in the name of protecting themselves. Claiming that "tolerant people would give him a second chance" is disgusting.

[(Anonymous)]

Dal, give it a rest.

Pretty much everyone knows that you've constantly talked to people about what Jex has done. It's shown on every single anon meme here. They talk about you as if you've talked to them about this.

You've enabled people with the information, and they're posting that information here. You are just as guilty of harassing as these anons are. You are enabling his harassment. Sure, it may be protecting people, but there are better ways to do it.

And don't say anything about you didn't know. You continued to tell these people after you knew they had posted to anon memes.

+1

[(Anonymous)]

[explosivecombat]

Anon, I'm going to be perfectly blunt with you.

There would be no details, there would be nothing to talk about, if Jex would stop with the problematic behavior. The wank could have died months ago. There would be no new details to spread. However, he doesn't learn, he has yet to stop harassing me, and he has yet to stop harassing my friends.

You can call me whatever you like for this, but the fact of the matter is that I have the right to tell my friends what I choose, and if he's continuing to harass me, then I'm not going to remain silent. I neither condone nor enable the spreading of information, but after what's been done, I'm also under no obligation to stop them from doing as they see fit with the information.

[(Anonymous)]

Then congratulations, you are just as big a wanker as them.

Go and collect your gold fucking medal, and give yourself a nice big pat on the back.

[(Anonymous)]

How the fuck does this make her a wanker? What is this logic?

Do you know how to social?

[explosivecombat]

I don't recall claiming to be making attempts at being a better person than anyone. The fact remains, however, that if he would cease the problematic behavior, he would stop hurting people. If he stopped hurting people, the wank would stop. This logic is perfectly linear and straightforward. There isn't anything convoluted about it. If you don't agree with it, that's your prerogative; you're more than welcome to look at this in any way you choose with no further argument from me.

[(Anonymous)]

What the fuck is this comment?

Is she not allowed to talk to her friends about what Jex has done? I'm sorry, is it something that she's expected to just sweep under the rug and never mention again, in case she hurts his feelings?

She has every right to talk to whoever the hell she wants about whatever the hell she wants. Jex did a bad thing by her, and she can tell whoever she likes that he did that bad thing. If he didn't want it spoken about? He shouldn't have done it. When bad things happen to me, I talk to my friends about it. It's what people do.

Dal has been nothing but mature and level-headed throughout this entire ordeal, which is more than I can say for some of the other people involved.

+INFINITY

[(Anonymous)]

I was trying to find a way to word this. Thanks.

OP that is too lazy to log in

[(Anonymous)]

I would specify and say "tolerant enough to deal with what Jex has done", but I don't think that would be accepted and not called disgusting either.

I think what I said isn't all that disgusting either. Like I said before, I am sorry this happened to you and I'm glad you were able to put your side of the story up and give me 90% of the details. (the 10% would come from Jex, his side of the story, but he's not posting here for obvious reasons)

There's also the matter of a difference in opinion as to what is incredibly heinous and what isn't. Jex wasn't intentionally malicious or harmful, you've stated this yourself, so I won't throw him to the lions for what he did on accident. If he didn't apologize for it or try to make it up to you, okay, I'd slap him up a bit for being rude. But aside from that, I have no reason to consistently hold him accountable for what he did as long as he's willing to try and change.

I also want to state here that I'm not forcing anyone on here to stop hating him. I can't make ACJ or RP anon comm stop their even more heinous demonizing of the guy, just as much as I can't make the past go away. I despise people making rash decisions and judgments without getting to know the facts first. Speak to both parties or get good deets from both parties, not parties who weren't directly involved. Meaning only you and Jex should speak their piece, and then the anons can form their own opinions and make their own decisions.

Anyone who is intentionally harmful or otherwise cruel to someone else is the kind of human being that makes me not want to live on this planet anymore. I'll do my part and try my hardest to get people to use their brains but, aside from that, there's not much I can do.

I'm glad you're one of those people that can use their brains, and I apologize if this made you waste your time. I also apologize if the anons not letting it die has effected you anymore than the initial harassment has.

I don't claim to have a degree in psychology, but my AIM is whysotrek and my Plurk is trekking if you feel the need to talk to someone about anything. I know I'm just a stranger, but a therapist is just a stranger with a degree aren't they?

+1

[(Anonymous)]

And Jex can't even say his side because the moment he does, he's going to get eaten alive.

-1

[(Anonymous)]

Personally? I'd rather see him come here and try to explain himself. Because right now all I see is him sending some whiteknights to defend his ass.

Yeah, there are probably people on here who hate him and would use everything he says against him. There are also others who would be willing to listen and try to figure out what in the good fuck he was thinking when he did this.

By not showing up here, he looks like a massive coward. For all we know, he's just whining to his friends and not even apologizing or feeling guilty for his behavior.

Re: -1

[theycallmesnake]

Wow, ACJ has a lot of people making assumptions huh?

I'm whiteknighting of my own accord. He didn't send me here, I took the initiative as a friend. You can call it cowardly if you want, but maybe he just doesn't want to put up with shit or end up saying anything that will ruin his rep even further?

But I'll see what I can do.

da

[(Anonymous)]

I hope you realise how condescending you're being at the moment.

[explosivecombat]

...actually, no, I think I understand what you mean by that first sentence. There are varying degrees of tolerance for things that one doesn't agree with or personally would find reprehensible dependent on severity. So no, I actually do understand what you mean, I think; it's less "tolerant enough to deal with it" and more "willing to deal with it in the name of tolerance," if that makes any sense. I apologize if that's convoluted, but I sometimes have difficulty understanding what people mean because I don't always process connotation in the way that I should - I apologize if I've been overaggressive on that point, and on the tolerance thing in general; I understand what you're saying now.

As I said, I do respect what you're trying to do, and I can likewise respect that standpoint - that the only people who should come forth with information should be the person wronged, ideally speaking - but at the same time, that isn't exactly going to happen here due to the nature of DW as a whole, and particularly ACJ. I've personally tried to wash my hands of the entire affair; any mentions I've made of Jex in public were either civil or free of namedropping. As I said above, I neither condone nor enable posting of details here, but I will admit that I don't feel obligated to stop it, either, simply because I see no need to shove my feelings down and hide it from my friends if someone is upsetting me. Again, if the problematic behavior toward me stopped, then there would be no more details. This is why I say that all of this stops when Jex decides it stops. Simple as.

I don't consider this a waste of my time, and I can private-plurk you later, if you would like. Again, thank you for being civil in this discourse; I really do appreciate it.

[(Anonymous)]

Then, here's my question to you.

What happens if one of your friends who is posting here gets angry at you? Do you honestly think they won't come here and talk shit about you?

[(Anonymous)]

What the hell has this got to do with anything?

Keep reaching.

[explosivecombat]

That's a perfectly valid question, but no, I wouldn't be surprised. I'm well aware of how this works, Anon; I'm not naive enough to think that the world is my best friend, and I learned a long time ago to not trust people at face value. I might be upset if one of my friends were to do something like that, yes, but I can't say that I would be surprised.

However, if I've wronged them - especially as severely as Jex as wronged me - then really? They have the right to talk all the shit they want.

[(Anonymous)]

Sounds to me like you've got shitty friends. I wouldn't want my friends going around sharing details I've said to them in private and constantly dragging my life into hate memes.

[explosivecombat]

Honestly, I see it less as trying to drag my name through god-knows-what-this-has-even-become, and more protectiveness on their part. What they've said has been related to the harassment incident, and not severely personal details from Jex's or my private lives. Should it come to that then yes, I would ask them to stop. But what's been said has been, so far, solely related to what's been done.

[theycallmesnake]

Someone once told me "How can we hold hands if we keep making fists." It makes sense.

I might have said it before and I'll either say it again or say it now, I don't blame you for your feelings or your actions.

My plurk is always open, as is my AIM, whenever I'm online for all sorts of discussions. You've proven to me you're not just going to go 'LOLOLOLOL YOU SUCK' or something idiotic like that, so I'm willing to talk to you if you need me. :3